The last 24hrs has been bewildering! There have been photographers on the doorstep both at home and at church. The phone has barely stopped ringing and whenever I have left the house I have felt conspicous. Thank the Lord it was my words, and not some naughty deed, that grabbed the nation’s attention, if only for a day!
Had I played ball I could have begun yesterday with the Today programme, moved to the GMTV sofa and racked up appearances on Radio 2, 4, 5 Live, London, Premiere, Kent which would only have added to television spots with SKY, BBC, ITV and Meridian. Even the papers in America and New Zealand have been trying to get hold of me. Not the most relaxing environment for a wife just 8 days from giving birth!! Sadly the one show I really wanted- Have I Got News for You – never rung! So bad luck press….better luck next time. I will, of course, happily talk to you concerning any OTHER given subject should you want a priest in the future.
So why hide? Mainly because the local press had shattered my trust. Rather than raising the point I made, concerning the spiritual vaccuum when Christ is removed from funerals, they ran instead with the ‘nasty vicar’ tag. A fact that hurt me deeply, not least because they know how hard I have been working to make the S. Barnabas’ community a better place. Why were the opening of the pre-school, my work with the primary school and plans to build a community centre totally overlooked? Why did they portray me as ‘out of touch’ when they KNOW I have been at the heart of a congregation that has doubled in recent years? These wounds were cut deeper by Meridian TV, who also ignored my point, crassly interviewing locals who had chosen pop music at funerals, simply to make me look ‘out of touch’. A cheap shot we call it on the rugby field! Why do they miss the point when almost all those commenting on websites, both atheist and Christian get it and agree?
Fortunately the Telegraph, Daily Mail, Express and Guardian were more balanced. Indeed the Mail today contains a reflection from A N Wilson which makes all the pain worthwhile. Read it here. Alleluia! Somebody who is interested in what I was trying to say!! He would delight in the fact that no copies of the modern Anglican liturgies have ever darkened these doors!
The Times was less impressive. Why did Ruth Gledhill find it necessary to highlight my support of Forward in Faith and opposition to women in holy orders on principled theological lines in accordance with the teaching of the church throughout the ages? I felt this said far more about her than me, after all it had absolutely nothing to do with the item!! I cannot help but wonder if her own feelings on this contentious issue influenced her decision to launch a scathing attack? pity as I always rather like her reporting and, as one who claims to be Christian, I would have thought she might have elevated my point.
Finally a huge thank you to the Church of England bishops for coming out in support and, like A N Wilson, using this opportunity to stand up for Jesus and his power to heal the grieving and departed. Oh sorry! My mistake….they let me take the heat alone. How much this says about the current malais in the church leadership that Wilson rightly discerns! And how much we already miss +Michael Nazir Ali!
Fortunately a Roman Catholic bishop did send me a message of support, along with literally hundreds of Christians in sympathy with my stand. Thank you to all those of you who are included in that number and especially Giles Walter, vicar of S. Johns, who popped in to see me. Finally thanks also to the pleasant media reps who dealt with me politely and respected my wishes. What a storm in a teacup!
Fr Ed, I first became aware of this issue last week when my mother told me about the story in the local paper. At the time my comment to Mum was ‘it sounds like a local reporter trying to make a name for themselves at someone else’s expense’. What a shame they succeeded – or is it? Maybe, those that have been interested by this story will dig deeper and discover the ‘real’ Father Ed. From a distance I hear about the great work you do, and you recently dealt with my Father’s funeral in a fantastic way. You are by no means out of touch, and gave great comfort to all members of our family, both young and those that are a little more mature!! You respected the wishes of my Father, and were more than happy for us to read some poems that my father had chosen. I have much admiration for the fact that you have such passion about your beliefs, and even if I do not agree with some of them I respect where you are coming from (but one day would love to sit down over a beer and discuss!!). I really do feel that you are the unfortunate victim of someone trying to get on in their career who has been a little misguided.
You have my 100% support for standing for the christian faith which is slowly dying. I have never understood the reason why you even bother conduct these funeral of the so called secular people….This is just political correctness gone wrong. Why would someone bother with a church funeral when they dont believe in Christ…its just like weddings and taking Christ out of it.
I am so proud of you standing for the Christian faith and valued
I applaud your courage and praise God for your words. We “Christians” mostly say nothing lest we offend those around us, but think nothing of the offense to God by us allowing such nonsense.
The fact that the bishops have left you to hang is good news, it means you must be doing something right!
I will pray for you and thank God for you.
Jonathan Heath – South Africa
We just wanted to say, well done you, for handling this situation so well, it most certainly couldn’t have been easy, the mainstream media can be very savage and of course sensationalist (to say the least – controversy and bad news sell!)
We agree that an appearance on “Have I got news for you” would have been the most appropriate and seriously cool
All blessings to you and to your wife and family and of course to your new bundle of joy!
Oh and by the way, we also badly miss Bish Naz!
Don’t worry, Sir. The long era of mediocrity is rapidly coming to an end. It is your critics who are out of touch. The problem with such pop music is that it delivers a severely restricted ’sentimental education’, leaving people unable to comprehend emotionally the facts – let alone the peaks and troughs – of life, instead rejecting ‘elitism’ (excellence), embracing vulgarity (the stunted demotic). The long interlude of peacetime consumerism has produced a desert sowed with salt.
Dear Rev Tomlinson,
I read the Times article yesterday – the way it was printed can make you sound like someone who finds your parishioners an irritation rather than seeing them as people Christ loves – but having read your blog this morning, I can see that nothing could be further from the truth.
I don’t believe for a moment that Christianity is dying – far from it -but you have highlighted the common issue of how hard it can be to find relevant ways of bringing the Gospel of Christ’s love and salvation into people’s lives today. At funerals, we want to connect people with the God who loves them dearly and who is walking alongside them, and yet we are so aware that this God might seem as foreign to them at this point in their lives as we are.
I don’t have any answers; the only thing I can suggest is that you keep doing what you’re doing, get to know the people on a human level during your funeral visits, get a feel for what they are really trying to say about or to their loved one through their choice of music, and prayerfully let your eulogies touch base between earth and heaven.
All the best to you and your family, and wishing you joy and sleep when your new baby arrives,
Amanda Bushnell (Mrs), (Reader in the Diocese of Liverpool, and Duty Chaplain at a Children’s Hospital).
Well done, Fr. Ed. I’m truly sorry for the devilish anger that has been directed against you and your family.
Can you imagine our Greek or Russian Orthodox brothers and sisters even getting their heads around this kind of thing?
A few years ago I stopped the playing of pop and rock music at funerals in my northern parish. I had never come across this before, and after a year of endurance, I could see that the whole thing was getting out of hand.
In principle I thought (and believe) that the most loving thing I can do for a poor deceased soul is to let them be surrounded by prayer and worship in a funeral liturgy. We do NOT need to be accompanied by Elton John or Tina Turner or the Saturdays in our final approach to Almighty God. We do need worship, prayer and divine compassion. That’s what a Christian funeral is for – and if you don’t want this, then we are not holding a gun to anyone’s head – there are plenty of venues who will give you what ever you want. But, get this, a Church is for Christian worship. Yes, really!
I tried to screen out the worst kind of music, but it even became difficult to ask people not to play explicitly anti Christian songs like John Lennon’s “Imagine”. I found it almost impossible to explain to a bereaved family why we allowed some secular pop music, and forbade others. The response I got was, “who are you to say which music is acceptable, and which is not?”
And so, reader, I banned the lot. Result: a calm, prayer, loving, inclusive place for anyone – anyone – who wanted to bury their loved ones with love, prayer and dignity.
Please count on our prayers for you and all your family.
God’s Love,
Jack
Dear Father Ed
I, too, have come to your blog to see what you really said. I’m strongly struck that we all seem to come to these things bringing heaps of baggage and expectations with us which deeply colour what we read. I, for my part, can find no trace of bigotry or out-of-touch religeosity in what you say. In fact, your concern for a lost world shines through (unwanted perhaps, but I think it’s your perogative to decide what will concern you).
Perhaps that’s just my colouring of what you say, but if I have understood you correctly, then it saddens me to read comments from both Christians and non-Christians who seem to have missed the point and understood you to be making a tirade against the “heathen sinners”, or in defence of a waning church.
The latter, the Christians, worry me more – I’m very struck by St Paul’s injuction in 1 Thes 4:12 to live in such a way that “your daily life may win the respect of outsiders”. When we bear in mind that Paul’s presence in Thessalonica had, just a few months earlier, resulted in riots he obviously was not advocating against causing the kind of uproar you’re going through. But as you and others on this blog discuss how much you are loved and respected by those in your community who interact with you, it seems to me perhaps you’ve managed to capture Paul’s intentions rather well. I wish more of us Christians could get that right.
As for the non-Christians, I’m rather inclined to side with those who look inward and ask why we Christians, the stewards of the “good news” seem to so many people to be bad news. It seems to me that the best we can do for a world that is losing touch with God is to start believing the promises of Jesus and take up those crosses daily as he suggested.
For your info you made the BBC World Service at 04.45 BST aldon with Canon Michael Saward who supported you view.
Well said. I just read about this online. I agree with you and just want to send a bit of support from afar.
Hi Ed.
I’m the journalist at Premier who rang to ask if you wanted to appear. I like to think as a Christian station, we’d have given you a fair crack of the whip to make your point, but I understand why you didn’t want to come on given your experience with the local press.
I just get frustrated with the amount of times I hear a similar story. I’ll phone someone wbout a story I’ve read to see if they want to come on the radio, and they’ll say the article was a total stitch up.
Somehow, journalists have got to get better at representing people, rather than just creating a story that isn’t there.
Best wishes for the birth and God bless,
Andy
With you all the way on this.
Grace & peace.
You are dead right, Father.
It was an education to read the comments on A.N. Wilson’s article. It does us good sometimes to look into the abyss.
As a former member of FinF, before emigrating to Canada in 1996 and taking the path to Rome shortly afterward (the Anglican Church of Canada being what it is) I just thought I’d let you know that I heard your funerals post being read on our national broadcaster, the CBC, this morning. However it was just read, without comment, or capricious spin. Good for you. As for the more momentous news of the day, I rejoice with and for all my Anglo-Catholic friends and look forward to being re-united.
My heart goes out to you, dear Father.
You said something really important in your blog and I hope, that when the dust settles, the nation can have the grown-up discussion that you have initiated. As someone who has been taking funerals for over twenty years, I totally agree with everything you have said.
God bless you, your wife and your new baby.
Dear Fr Ed,
What I seem to find is that once the media panjandrum starts up, the only information that is going to make it over the net, from you at teh centre, or anyone else, is stuff that either deos, or can be twisted into, a reinforcing element of “the story.” It’s very hard not to take that personally, especially if what si being twisted is something that matters desperately to you, like your faith.
Having spent some time with you in your parish earlier this year, the crown jewels of what you’re about was obvious your commitment to holistic mission and willingness to build community and draw people together in a parish that hasn’t by any means always had a fair crack of the whip. That’s what your hard work in the school, in the broader community (with the play), in the Church is all about, and the links are seamless, because it’s not a job for you, it’s a way of life founded on faith. It’s Catholic in every sense of the term. Actually anyone who went to the place could feel what was really going on from a mile off.
Sadly this way of life, Catholic in every sense of the word, is hard to fit into the rather attentuated, ignorant “nice vicar nasty vicar” stereotype that everything has to be fitted into.
But by engaging, however hurtfully to yourself, you have at least held out the possibility of a more truthful account to those who are willing to consider such a thing possible. As for the others, a la Luke 11, maybe we all just have to shake off the dust and pass on.
I hope in all of this help was available from your DCO, and it may be there’s learning out of it for thopse of us in other diocese about the assistance and support you must need when you’re being shot at, seemingly, on your own.
Every blessing and all best — don’t let the…
Dear Fr Ed.
The press does not like good news: helping blind man to cross the road is not news that sells papers. Blind man hits girl with stick does make the press pages.
Over the years the Courier has ignored many successes by community groups, so really you shouldn’t have been surprised by what they print and what they do not print.
I agree with you and back you 100%
Follow your conscience. ‘amid the encircling gloom’. The road to Rome is not a popular or easy one as Newman knew too well. You will be welcomed.